


Never Grow Up

by blasphemyincarnate



Series: When We Fall [2]
Category: Supernatural
Genre: Death, Familial Love, Family, Gen, Grieving, Hardships, Loss, Love, Mourning, Thoughts of Suicide, boom four dead siblings, but she does exist in the show, cuz it sure as hell ain’t meg, honestly I didn’t know where I was going with this and suddenly I’m writing and, i didn’t mean to do that, killed herself when the actual Meg masters’s body showed up?, look I consider katelyn an OC cause I named her, makes u wonder what the demon’s name actually was, not mentally stable like at all, sibling relationships
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-08-14
Updated: 2018-08-14
Packaged: 2019-06-27 00:05:02
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,099
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15673983
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/blasphemyincarnate/pseuds/blasphemyincarnate
Summary: “Ms. Masters? We’re calling to inform you that your sister, Megara, was fatally stabbed yesterday afternoon.”What?“I’m sorry for your loss, miss.”That wasn’t right.Meg wasn’t supposed to die.Meg was supposed to laugh and marry Castiel and have three children and grow old at her side.Meg was supposed to come over for dinner.(But she never showed.)This had to be a cruel joke.(But she never showed.)





	Never Grow Up

She wasn’t dead.

Meg wasn’t dead because Meg was her older sister and older sisters don’t  _die_. Not like this.

They're supposed to be invincible.

Right?

Too many people, too many faces,  _how many of you even knew her_?

How many knew how Meg laughed or how Meg loved Jolly Ranchers or how Meg would tuck her in at night with a smile and a kiss and-

Now isn’t the time for memories. Now is the time for a brave face and a soft smile and standing close to Castiel because Castiel was there and that means Castiel has to know she isn’t dead. 

bravefacebraveface _braveface_ -

No. That’s wrong. The people are looking at her weird, she can hear them whispering, is that Mrs. Walker asking “why isn’t she upset?” in a too loud voice?

People hush Mrs. Walker and Katelyn doesn’t drop her facade.

Someone nearby whispers “she’s in shock” and someone else announces “it hasn’t sunk in yet” quietly but they’re both  _wrong_ because Meg isn’t dead and  _why is she the only one who realizes?_

Someone’s hugging her. Someone tall. Old books and coffee seem to bombard her senses and it’s so so  _so_ disorienting and something wet is on her face now.

A hand goes up; brushes against tears and comes down again.

Her tears. Why is she crying?

Her tears. Not the hugger’s.

Who?

Sam. Sammy. Sammy Winchester. He’s a good friend.

”She’s not dead, you know. Everyone thinks she is but I know Meg. This is just her idea of a stupid practical joke,” she says. She insists. She refuses to believe otherwise.

And Sam, bless him, believes her. Finally,  _finally_ someone believes her if only for the sake of believing. He nods at her. He believes. Right?

”But he is.” Sam’s voice. Quiet quiet but so loud at the same time.

But he is.

But who is?

”Azazel, I mean. You know.”

Oh.

Azazel.

He’s dead? He’s dead. Cas stabbed him. Cas stabbed him trying to get to Meg because she was stabbed-

No. That’s not right.

Yet Azazel is dead.

(Her father? No, he doesn’t deserve that. That’s what Meg always used to say. “He doesn’t deserve us, Katie.”)

”That’s good.”

(Sammy Winchester doesn’t leave her side during the funeral and neither does Castiel and she briefly wonders where Meg is before her eyes flick up to the front and-

Oh.

Right.

They put fake-Meg in a box.)

Everything after that is too blurry too fast too bright and someone says “I’m sorry for your loss” and someone else repeats it and it’s all she hears over and over and over and-

Someone said something different.

”Your sister left this for you.”

Something is pressed into her hands.

An ivory envelope.  _To_  and  _from_ and her name and Meg’s name and-

It’s an ivory envelope.

”Katelyn, I’m going to give you nice paper and nice envelopes and you’re going to write letters, okay?”

Is that Meg talking to her?

”We aren’t safe, and I don’t want any of us to go out without some last words from each other.”

Who’s us? Russell? Her brother. She had a brother. Two brothers and two sisters. Meg and Russell and Jemmy and Fiona and Katelyn.

All dead now.

The letter is proof of that because Meg would never go this far for a practical joke.

Her siblings are all officially gone now.

Maybe she should join them.

”Oh.

”Thank you for giving this to me.

”I didn’t know what she did with them.”

She turns away and opens the letter and-

_Katie, love. You know I’ve never been good with words but that’s not going to stop me from trying, okay?_

_If you’re reading this letter... well, I imagine you know what it means._

_I’m sorry it ended like this. Hopefully we were still on good terms. I’m always going to regret losing Fiona the way we did._

_Hopefully you’re still my dumbass baby sister, yeah?_

_Well._

_I’ve never been good with words and it looks like being dead doesn’t change that._

_I’m sorry. Is that too soon?_

_Yeah. Like six seconds is probably too soon._

_Katie, love, I’m gonna ask you to do something for me, okay? One last favor for your bossy big sister._

_I’m going to ask you to please, please, stay alive. Rely on your friends for support but stay alive._

_God. I’ve rewritten this letter a thousand times. All the other copies are in a box underneath my bed, if you want those._

_If you’re reading this letter, it means you’ve lost me too and I’m so, so, so sorry for that. I need you to be strong for me, okay? Live for me. I’m not going to be able to travel to Vienna or kiss on top of a Ferris wheel or watch a fire dancer breathe flames so I’m going to need you to do that for me, okay?_

_Okay._

_I know you will. You’re a great little sister like that._

_I love you. You’re still a dumbass, but I love you._

_Still not great with words but that’s okay because I think you know what I mean._

_Go ask Krissy out sometime soon!!_

_Love, Meg_

Is she crying? There’s something on her cheeks but she doesn’t know if she’s crying.

Something’s obviously wrong. Faces are swimming in front of her and Sammy Winchester is saying something but she can’t hear it and someone else has walked into the room but she can’t remember his name just knows he has the brightest green eyes-

Who’s Krissy?

Krissy Chambers.

Right.

Meg wanted her to make a move and she was going to but it’s kinda pointless now isn’t it?

“No, it’s not pointless. Take your time and when you’re ready make a move, okay?”

Who’s that?

Sammy Winchester. He has the brightest soul she’s ever seen (which isn’t saying much - she hasn’t seen any).

Did she say that out loud?

She must look confused-

Green eyes is walking over now. He’s leading Sammy Winchester away.

That’s okay. He wasn’t hers.

Krissy Chambers. Maybe she would be.

Katelyn doesn’t know but Katelyn looks at the letter again-

are those her tears blurring the paper?

-and decides she’s going to live for Her. For Meg.

(andRussellandJemmyandFiona)

(and she’ll live for Jess and Mary and Andy and Jake and every other person Azazel Masters took from this world)

(and she’ll be okay)

Katelyn Masters gently puts the letter away and-

Something is still wrong there’s still that gaping hole and someday she’s going to fall in but-

For now, it’s okay.


End file.
